Music

Years ago I used to think that listening to music was a total waste of time. A needless hobby which has no benefits whatsoever. So much, that I would question everyone back then about why they’d do such a pointless thing.

The answer I most frequently got was: because it was relaxing.

I was even more confused. To the me back then, music was nothing but noise. If you I wanted to relax, it would be better if I was in some dark room, devoid of everything.

Yeah, back then a pure combination of total darkness, silence and solitude was my only way of releasing stress.

Still is, though. Just not the ONLY way anymore.

I don’t know since when, but I have come to realize what I did not before. That listening to music was relaxing.

Why?

Because it gives me something to focus on. To escape the literal world I live in.

This is also partially why I like music with good lyrics. Because its something more concrete that I can focus on apart from the shapeless melody that accompanies it. Of course the melody complements the lyrics. Or else I’d be more of a fan of poems, won’t I?

Poems are not bad, by the way. ^^

It’s a bad habit, actually. To focus so much on music that you I tend to ignore everything else around me.

I’d turn on the volume so loud that often I don’t realize that my attention was needed elsewhere until I see frantic body/hand movements from someone else.

Somehow the loud music brainwashes my mind and throws me into a pseudo-consciousness that lies to me. Saying:

there’s no one around you. Your world is only consists of what you can see. Other than that, nothing exists, even space. Everything around you is just a limitless black vortex.

ooh~ brainwash in progress~

Yeah. That’s actually what I see when I’m focused on something, in case anyone was wondering. Nothing but the thing I’m handling. Haha.

I think I’m getting to much off track.

Actually the purpose of this update is this:

My new baby!!!

It’s JUST toooo Friggin AWESOME!!!!! XD

I’m an extremely materialistic person. I know.

It’s not my fault that I like inanimate objects better than humans. It’s just that I don’t like them enough.

If I like it, I get thrown into total obsession. ^^

I just don’t have a reason to get obsessed over humans at the moment.

^^

Hirai Ken 平井堅 - Aika(Elergy) 哀歌(エレジー)



you wouldn't know how estatic i was when i found this song! believe it or not i have been searching for this for the past TWO YEARS ever since i heard it on music station (a japanese music show that airs the week's chart toppers)

Since i was unable to remember the name, only the artist, i had been going through his albums one by one and then i FOUND it!!!

I FINALLY FOUND THE FREAKIN SONG!!! WOW!

okay i know most of you guys dont actually READ japanese so im gonna paste the romanji lyris + english translation below.

Romaji

Shigamitsuita senaka ni sotto tsume wo tatete
Watashi wo kizamikonda motto yume no naka e

Hirahira maichiru hanabira ga hitotsu
Yurayura samayoi yukiba wo nakushita

Sono te de sono te de watashi wo yogoshite
Nando mo nando mo watashi wo kowashite
Asebamu samishisa wo kasaneawase
Mabushikute mienai yami ni ochiteku
Itsuka horobiyuku kono karada naraba
Mushibamaretai anata no ai de

Kono yamai ni namae ga areba raku ni nareru
Hamidasu koto ga kowai douka mure no naka e
Hirahira maichiru hanabira ga hitotsu
Yurayura samayoi anata wo mitsuketa

Kono te de kono te de anata wo yogoshite
Nando mo nando mo anata ni oborete
Senaka awase no fuan to yorokobi
Namiuchinagara watashi wo tsukisasu
Itsuka kiete yuku kono omoi naraba
Ima hikisaite anata no ai de

Sono te de sono te de watashi wo yogoshite
Nando mo nando mo watashi wo kowashite
Asebamu samishisa wo kasaneawase
Mabushikute mienai yami ni ochiteku
Itsuka horobiyuku kono karada naraba
Mushibamaretai anata no ai de
Watashi wo yogoshite sono te de sono te de






English

As I clung to you, you dug your nails into my back
And carved me, taking me deeper into a dream

One of the fluttering, scattering flower petals
Wavers, wanders, it’s lost its place

Dirty me with your hands, with your hands
Break me again and again, again and again
We put our two sweaty lonelinesses together
And fall into a bright, invisible darkness
If my body’s going to die one day
Then I want it to rot from your love

I’d feel better if this sickness had a name
I’m afraid to stick out, I move into the crowd somehow
One of the fluttering, scattering flower petals
Wavers, wanders, I’ve found you

I’ll dirty you with my hands, with my hands
And drown in you again and again, again and again
Our two backs together gives me anxiety and happiness
That comes in waves, penetrating me
If this love’s going to die someday
Tear me apart now with your love

Dirty me with your hands, with your hands
Break me again and again, again and again
We put our two sweaty lonelinesses together
And fall into a bright, invisible darkness
If my body’s going to die one day
Then I want it to rot from your love
With your hands, dirty me, dirty me

now you know why i like this song? the song tune itself is so catching and the lyrics are so meaningful + a bit sadistic... heh.

Ya-HA!!!