Friday, July 31, 2009

Random update

Wanted to put something special here. was thinking ans thinking and thinking and then stopped due to never-ending labs and assignments.

so whatever this is impromptu. hahah...

not many of my posts are impromptu, i normally have them typed out earlier or had some sort of idea of what to write beforehand.

err...

actually nothing significant happened recently. just that finally i understood the meaning of not enough time.

last time, i had time to rush my assignments the night before. not anymore. had to do it at night in weekends cuz the weekdays are so goddamn packed full that cannot do anything else but bathe and sleep.

why weekend days cannot do, you ask? because weekend days are spent in the lab analyzing field trip samples = staring into microscopes for hours on end for the entire day.

last time, i had time to study for tests last minute (eg the night/hour before). now? the night before i would fall asleep attempting to study and not realize i've fallen asleep until the next morning.

the hour before? got class. so study during class while sitting in the LAST row hoping the lecturer doesn't notice.

haih... actually we had been warned by our seniors.

"aiyer you all no time to do anything else one"

"sem 3 you all wan to sleep ah? jangan harap lah"

"Go outing? go play? wait until sem over ah."

oh btw. was supposed to have a field trip today but was cancelled. postponed to next week.

no bad for an impromptu post, i'd say. should do this more often. XD

Friday, July 24, 2009

...

I thought,
I can finally believe in myself.

I thought,
I have overcame my fears, regained my lost confidence.

I thought,
I had improved.

I thought,
Someone finally acknowledged my improvement, my efforts.

I thought,
Someone finally believed in me, my skills.

And so I was ecstatic.

I felt so grateful for that belief, that trust.
But it turns out I was wrong.
I was still doubted by everyone.

I did not win that trust I needed.

And so I was disappointed.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

...

i knew it.

i WAS in denial.

i still am.

otherwise i wouldnt feel like this after doing 'that' today.

but my subconsious still pretends i'm not if i don't do whatever i did.

it forces my consious to believe i've gotten over it and continue life as it is.

I'm in denial that i'm denial.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

why? WHY...??!

2nd sem:
after registering for french 1 i decided to take french 2 and 3 on sems 3 and 4 respectively, thus effectively using up ALL my free electives and leaving the final year FREE for my FYP (haha i so pandai kan?), despite warnings from seniors that 3rd sem was a really really really packed semester with no time to sleep due to the field trip analysis and presentation.

hope level 100%

i got my 3rd semester's timetable at the end of sem 2 and indeed it was really packed with lectures and labs. but nevertheless i decided to take french 2 if the elective's hours by a miraculous chance fit into the really packed timetable.

hope level 25%

3rd sem:

first day of class the lecturers announced the change in the timetable, apparantly everything had to be changed and a new one would be released. after getting our hands on the new version, the lecturers then proceeded to cancel of 3 credit hours (due to human error - a subject that we did not sign up for) and move away 1 credit hour to another time.

that left the timetable looking pretty blank. blank enough that there was a high chance of fitting in french 2. yay! ahahah...

hope level 80%

now:

morning:
was cursing a certain lecturer for having both his theory and lab classes in the morning. of his were in the afternoon and i only hafta wake up at 6.30am on 1 day in 5. but as it is due to his classes i have 3 early days. (the rest of the days classes start at 11.)

afternoon:
went to check the timetable of french 2.

hope level 85%

...


...


...


...


...

Crap.

...


...

the given time for french 2 was SMACK in the middle of that lecturer's lab classes. (remember? the one i cursed in the morning?)

*silent wailing*

hope level 0%

>insert critical health level beeping sound here<

not fair!!!

why play with my hope level like that??!!

cannot then cannot la!! dun change here change there let people regain hope lose it!

ugh.

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

I've got LINE!!!!

Finally my house in k.t has internet access. apparently i'm one of the first among my friends to get have access, although was (i think) the last to register for it.

And that was just last week!!!

Super-efficient la that guy! Thank you En. Saufi!!!

and SOME PEOPLE mentioned before it needed two-three MONTHS to get ready. sheeshhh....

been bragging about it all day haha... i think my course mates wanna kill me liao. pitiful them. applied long time ago d now also havent get.

staying stuck in a house with no internet connection and nothing else to do is SO boring. no class, no assignments, no projects, blah.... etc.

now only have to worry about monthly bill...

=_="